All or nothing

I am a very dramatic AND categorical person. In my life there is only love and hate, there is no room for “sort of like it, but not really”. My partner simply hates it, especially if we are arguing. “If you don’t like the way I am saying, I won’t tell you anything” happens way too often in my life. And this one of my favorite things about me and the thing that I hate about myself the most.

The part that sucks the most is that there is no middle ground for me. It clouds my judgment and sometimes prevents from seeing the situation clearly. If I like the person/job/idea, there is nothing bad about it. I might see flaws, but they become insignificant. If I hate something, there are only bad things about it and, for some reason, they become much more important. I am supposed to be grown-up and realize that there isn’t just black and white in the world. However, I choose (sometimes even consciously) to see only black and white. Because it’s way better than settling for something in the middle. If I love, it’s with my whole heart. If I want something, I will pour all my energy into that. I am trying to plan my wedding and i

I am trying to plan my wedding and it’s a constant fight with my parents. My partner pushes me to settle for a compromise, for something in the middle. But is it really worth it? Is it worth to sacrifice your happiness while knowing that no matter what you do another person will be unhappy? I would rather go down fighting than give up somewhere in the middle just to please others. It’s much better to love with all your heart than to accept something close to love, but not really. In the long-run, real and strong love brings much more and it’s not necessarily joy.. It’s just an experience which teaches and helps us to grow more and I couldn’t be more grateful for that.

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