I used to say that I want to ride motorcycle one day without actually experiencing it. I used to say it was so much fun without even trying to use it or actually falling. During one of the less successful trips, we fell and I wasn't even then one driving. Nonetheless, I was freaking out before the first ride after a fall.
As I said, I come from the country which is beautiful outside and not so much inside. Hence, we have so much sadness and frustration inside of us and everyone assumes that we left because of the search for the better life. Sadly, no one thinks there can be another reason.
I was born and raised in a country which has to most beautiful nature and pretty ladies. I have no idea why, but we are really proud of those two things as if there is nothing else to be proud of. Personally, I have a love-hate relationship with Lithuania.
When I was living in Lithuania, I had never felt as if I am a part of the community in my neighborhood. I knew some of the people living nearby because I used to play with their children when I was little, but we have never really helped each other and made coffee for each other. It was even worse when I moved to the capital and my neighbors were spread across 6 or 7 floors. Some of them I have never met. The place where I live now is completely different - we are actually a community.
I've heard about 'Doors of Perception' a while ago - my mother was reading it maybe a decade ago. It took my a while, but we have similar taste and she knows her way around the books. I remember how interested she was when reading the book and how inspired she was afterward. So, when I got my hands on it, I was really excited about that.
Almost a year ago, I found out that I would be finally moving to the Netherlands. That's a decision (or realization) that made me feel everything at the same time - from uplifting joy to everything consuming panic. For stronger dramatic effect, I would love to say that this decision changed everything, but in reality... yes, there were quite a bit adjustments, changes, growth, but still many things are the same.
I am constantly amazed how different my home country (Lithuania) and the Netherlands are. Also, there are so many great things that we could learn from the Dutch. The thing that I like most - you can be whatever you want if you don't hurt others. They don't stick to the rules, to the stereotypes. Dutch as a nation and as a country constantly evolve and seek for something just a bit better, just a bit more suitable for people.